Insulted By A Gadget

Personal Exercise and Analyzing Card

So today I was going to tell you about my day and how I hadn’t done my big block walk but rather several smaller walks. But then I went and checked the mail!

Today arrived my free pedometer from Prevention Magazine. I got quite giddy and excited to try out my new pedometer, but when I opened the envelope, inside was small square box that said “Personal Exercise & Analyzing Card” on the outside. I was beginning to wonder what the heck this was as it should have been just a pedometer.

The box description says:

Multi-functional credit card size exercise assistant, pedometer and fat analyzer. This ultra slim device includes the following functions:

- Stores up to 5 personal data profiles
- Step counter
- Distance counter
- Calories counter
- Body fat meter and monitor
- Clock and alarm

I was thinking I had won the lottery with this pedometer! I mean all I was expecting was one that counted my steps not one that does everything but wash the dishes.

I open the box excitedly to find this credit card super slim electronic gadget. I pull the plastic tab from the battery compartment and I see the unit light up with zeros and flashing numbers and a beep. This was so exciting to me!

I open the instruction manual to figure out what all the buttons do and how to set it up. I really think you need a college degree or maybe a university degree to operate this, or give it to a toddler!

The information booklet tells you that the first step is to set the time, which I did. Then it tells you to fill in your height, weight, age and if you are male or female. No problems with filling in the information at all. Then I get to the part where it wants to get a reading on my body fat. If you know me then you know this is not going to be good.

There are two thumb areas on the bottom of the credit card device that you press set and then put your thumbs on and it will tell you what your body fat is and then it has an overall guide as to how you are doing with your fitness.

Ok that is how it is SUPPOSED work. I press the set button and put my two thumbs on the correct place and wait while it calculates my body fat. Considering it is a mechanical item I never thought I would be insulted by it, but I was.

Before I tell you what happened I will explain that I had been goofing around with the unit with their “fake” figures and I had done the body fat reading using their anorexic figures and I had a 17.4% body fat which was supposed to be fabulous according to their guide.

When I put in my information it read ERR. So I figured I must have not held the contacts properly. Reset the unit and tried again. ERR again! Now I am thinking something is wrong with this unit. Not more than 5 minutes ago it was telling the fake person I had a 17.5% Body Fat and not it is saying ERR.

My daughter was sitting next to me so I asked her to put her thumbs on the contacts and see if it would read for her as I had lotion on my hands. ERR it read. Now we are laughing because no matter what we do we keep getting ERR. So, as it can hold up to 5 profiles, I switched to the number two profile and went to the body fat section and pressed the set button, put my thumbs on the contacts and it reads… 17.5% body fat! Argh

So now I know that the unit is working again I switch back to my profile and get it to the body fat setting and would you believe it, it said ERR!

Now we are laughing at this ERR and I said, “You can’t read fat in my thumb? How about my belly?” And I put it on my tummy, only to get the reading ERR. Of course you know we are having too much fun with this gadget now and my smart assed daughter said, “Mom, put it on your boobs!” So I did and it said ERR. For those that don’t know me, I have a smaller chest than my daughter. When the reading came up ERR she didn’t miss a beat and said, “Mom maybe it is using echo location!” I couldn’t do anything for laughing!

Now my daughter and I are in hysterics because it can’t read someone’s body fat that is not anorexic. We decided that ERR means CANT READ THAT HIGH! LOL

I can honestly say that I have never been insulted by a gadget before now, and believe me I will not let this lil thing forget it!

©2011 7Ladybugs
February 14, 2011