Belly Dancing or Belly Wobble?

Today I was not feeling good at all. It all started when my honey made me some three-minute noodles on Tuesday night because I was hungry and he was making some. I have had those noodles before but didn’t really put two and two together until yesterday when I my stomach was doing flip-flops.

Oh well, another day in the life of me! I can’t complain because I know that there are people worse off than me.

So, as I have been telling you, I have been walking just about daily around my neighborhood, aka the free gym, and I have been feeling a lot more energetic. I wouldn’t be entering any marathons or anything but even after a few weeks of walking you can feel the difference.

The only problem I am having right now, other than being sick, is the snow that has piled up outside. We have about a foot of snow and more is expected to fall this weekend. Well, I am putting into action what I normally do when I cant walk on the sidewalks, I am going to the grocery store and walking up and down their isles while looking for the one or two items that I need.

It is a free way to get exercise and get your shopping done as well. If you want a really good work out, walk around the perimeter of the store and then walk up and down the isles before grabbing your purchases. You can get exercise anywhere if you really think about it.

If you don’t have to go to the grocery store, go to the library and walk around their book stacks.

If you can’t go out, then walk up and down the stairs in your house or walk around your house a couple of times each hour. Trust me as long as you are moving it doesn’t really matter where you walk.

If you want to have some real fun and you can laugh at yourself, rent or borrow a “Belly Dancing for Beginners” DVD or vhs.

My daughter and I have never laughed so hard as when a friend lent us her Belly dancing dvd’s. They ranged from beginners to advanced and you know which one we put on first, the advanced one!

To start off with I should explain that we are in shape, round is a shape! And our wobbly parts do like to wobble on their own.

So, if you put music to it and try and get the figure eight belly-dancing move down you are in for a real laughing experience. My daughters belly decided it wanted to do disco and not follow along while mine wanted to do some jazz.

“Move your hips to the side and SNAP. Move your hips to the back and SNAP. Move your hips to the other side and SNAP and repeat all the way around the circle” The lady on the DVD instructed.

If we were to do it as enthusiastically as she was, we would have taken out walls or knocked over things. We decided that maybe we should put on the beginners dvd.

“Welcome to belly dancing for beginners. You will learn all the basic moves of belly dancing in one easy lesson!” The overly excited instructor said.
“To start off, tie a bell around your waist so that you can hear it jingle when you thrust your hips. It is a real treat when you hear the bell ringing!”

Well, about this time I needed mouth to mouth because I was laughing so hard. I had this image in my head of cow bells tied around our waists and CLANG CLANG CLANGing as we thrust our hidden hips with such force that the farmer across the street would think that his cows had jumped the fence again.

After the laughing stopped and we had dried our tears, we managed to press play on the dvd and sort of managed to get our hips swinging one way while our bellies went the other way. Something has got to give in this game of belly dancing. Either the hips and belly need to co-operate or I need a doctor because I will be dislocating something.

The dvd is only half an hour long but we only managed to get through the first hip thrust to the front and hip thrust to the back before we were breaking out in a sweat. I am not sure how these people dislocate their hips to do this but my body is telling me that belly dancing should be called “Large Peoples Demolition Dance” because you know someone is going to knock out a wall or a window with all the thrusts and snaps they want you to do.

And who would think this is sexy? I cannot think that Bessie the cow swinging and thrusting and clanging at her mate would be seen as sexy!

That day we found out that belly dancing was not something that we can add to our resume.

Another tip for you if you want to try belly dancing, if you have a teenage son then make sure you get this in before he comes home from school or he will be scared for life. I can tell you this from experience as my son came home and looked at us like we grew two heads.

“Mom! WTF are you doing? That just looks so wrong!”

“It’s belly dancing” I reply “Do you want to join us?”

“No Mom! I want to live thanks anyway!”

* rolls eyes * Boys!


©2011 7Ladybugs
February 24, 2011